Municipal Pornography and Fantasy Gifts Store against Liquor Store | Non Humor

Municipal Pornography and Fantasy Gifts Store against Liquor Store
By Andy Alt / Political Dimensions

[I originally posted this as an opinion at Northfield News Letters to the Editor 8/30]

Aug 30, 2008 – Mister F. has written that Northfield needs a new Liquor Store. He very handily stated several supporting reasons why it would be a good idea.

Does a liquor store pose more of a threat than a pornography and fantasy gifts store? In Minnesota, one must be 21 to purchase liquor; you must be only 18 to purchase an “adult” movie, 17 to see an Rated “R” movie (unless you are accompanied by an adult, whereas you only need be six years old).

So the reason no one is screaming for a porno shop is because less people talk about porno than liquor. Liquor is much more socially acceptable. Anyone can verify that there is a healthy market for pornography. Logically, if pornography was made more available by retailers to consumers, there would be a substantial increase in sales and profit from X-rated material. Talk about reaching new heights!

But I’m sure readers would like me to elaborate and state the similarities now that I’ve mentioned the differences. That will be very quick work, because on many points made in the letter to the editor on this page, the words liquor store can be replaced with pornography store. Allow me to extend further on my claim by hardening some of the details:

The recent letter to the editor about Northfield’s municipal pornography store implies that in some way the store is involved in the substance abuse that so recently became a more serious problem than in the past.

You see, porno is no more a problem now than it has been, and has no bearing on substance abuse. Medically speaking, sexual intercourse (including masturbation) has been known to be good for exercise, and it also raises endorphins, thereby averting the need for pharmacological stimulation and other artificial methods of achieving ecstasy.

, turning the municipal pornography store over to private enterprise will in no way affect the equation of substance abuse. The local store is a well-run business that just happens to be a municipal enterprise which likely has better control over function than many a private firm might have.

There is a steady market for pornography, so why not allow the city to profit from its sale rather than some private firm that may have no local obligations of any kind and which takes its profit out of local control.

A municipal store is obligated to the public which owns it. A private firm may have no such obligation. I fail to see how a municipal porno store can be considered “a huge distraction.” It would be equally a “distraction” were it a private enterprise. Whenever I buy an adult movie or sex toy, I’m assured that part of that sale goes into municipal enterprise and not into the pockets of some firm…

A new pornography store is needed for greater accessibility for handicapped persons and in no way will affect our local problem of substance abuse.

Liquor and pornography are both legal in this country. Both are considered immoral by some portion of the population. And to be clear, I’m not advocating any type of pornography that includes non-consenting adults, or people who have been drinking. Only sober, consenting adults who have made the decision in a free country to have sex in front of a camera, or drink while they are on vacation. Human-trafficking and the sex trade is something I’m also against, but I’m also against pretty much everything that forces a person or child to do something against their will and in violation of their American or human rights.

My point to all this is not to seriously advocate for a pornography store, but to suggest that if we’re going to have this discussion, lets discuss it all honestly and figure out what we want to sell and what we don’t.

Personally, I haven’t smoked any marijuana for a while, but if I were, I would much rather buy it from the City than from a dealer. I would know my money is going to a good cause, and I’d know that the marijuana wouldn’t be laced with anything. But don’t worry, I’d only smoke my City merchandise in the privacy of my own home, I wouldn’t infringe on anybody’s rights, and I would never sell or give it to a child.